Saturday, August 1, 2009

The Balancing Act

My Pop and I just got back from the Home Depot. This particular store was my father's regular hang-out; what with having been a carpenter in the past, he loved to go there and check out the new merchandise. Unfortunately, today I had my share of surprises when my Dad almost fell down twice in the store. He walks with a cane, but he is having increased difficulty in maintaining his balance. His doctor told me that this was to be expected, as a lack of depth perception is another symptom of Alzheimer's Disease, in addition to the very expected memory loss.
Outside of putting him in a wheelchair, which I would like to delay for as long as possible, I do not really know what to do.
I am curious as to what percentage of Dementia and Alzheimer's patients develop serious problems in keeping their balance, when walking from point A - to point B. I have not heard of too many complaints regarding this (balance) issue, so I am very dismayed that my father is having such a hard time (just in walking).
I took him to Denny's for a late lunch afterwards, and I had to fish out a conversation, as he sat there nibbling on his sandwich; apparently, lost in thought in a word faraway from my world. His symptoms are getting worse. Moreover, I am getting tired and anxious at the same time. I miss not having my Dad with me like in the old days. The man I have living with me is, unfortunately, a shadow of the man I knew before.
Sometimes, I ask myself if I am doing worse in taking care of him in his own home, rather than placing him in a nursing home. But, I think that action would contribute to a worsening (even more) of his condition.
Sometimes, I just do NOT have the answers. I wonder if this is normal?

2 comments:

no1daughteroflewydad said...

Hi Ricardo,

I feel for you. My Dad sometimes has problems with his balance, but it's more his gait. He freezes and doesn't know which foot to move, which can unbalance him. But this is because Dad has Alzheiners and Lewy body Dementia, the Lewy bit has Parkinson symptoms with it.
How's your Dad's blood pressure, eyesight and ears, all which can lead to balance problems.
I guess you need to ask your Dad's doctor.
Concerning permanent care, it's a tough call and over the next few months I will have to make that decision for my Dad. And yes there are days/nights where it's so difficult that I wonder too if he would get better care by people who aren't worn out and that day will come when I can no longer maintain the level of care around the clock, by myself.
Dad has stayed a few times/respite in a care facility which will be the place that he will go to eventually. He actually enjoys his stays. They have an art/craft therapist, a lovely chap who bought in an old radio for Dad to tinker with (Dad was an electrician), they go on outings, bbq's, and drives and one day they did a group outing to the beach town where Dad grew up. If the place is right it doesn't have to be all doom and gloom, BUT it doesn't make the decision any easier.
I have to tell you this story, a chap whose Mum had Alzheimers was in a nursing home and he visited with his children and she said to him 'Oh darling, it's so nice to see you but how did you get the captain to stop the ship'. She thought she was on a cruise. There was always people around to chat with, people bought her food and drinks and she had her own cabin.
I hope this helps in some way but yes, you have to watch out still because not all staff and facilities are great. And even with the terrific place I found we had an episode with medication but I was aware to look out for this and got an email from Dad's doctor sent to prevent, the mishap.
How I found this place, I phoned around and asked for tours of places and believe you me there were some places where I came home in tears and wanted to go back and rescue all the people and then I found, Dad's little place where he likes it.
I hope this has helped and there are some wonderful caring people out there like the blogger 'senoir safari' who worked in aged care.
Do lots of homework and ask people which places they recomend. It will help to put your mind and heart at ease.

sending you and your Dad lots of best wishes.

Ricardo Gomez-Roji said...

Thank you for your kind comments and concerns. Your feedback helps me a great deal. Thank you, thank you, thank you!